Hi, hello, hi. If you’re reading this on the 20th of October, that means that in less than 2 days im leaving the country. Leaving the country as i am and as it is. Choosing the English countryside was a pure gut feeling. That part of England, for me, had always embodied the earth element, something I’ve longed for after feeling adrift and suspended in mid air, all year long.
Life can sometimes play funny little games with you, summoning and unleashing her elements throughout your days, and then somehow shaping you.
Her fire to shake you awake, her water to cool your fire, her air to sweep you off your feet and then offering some earth to ground you. Is it all orchestrated? Part of some plan? I honestly don’t know.
What if her fire burns me to ashes? What if her water drowns my lungs? A quiet drowning from the inside out. Her air, what if it scatters me away? And the Earth buries me alive, a heavy soil on top.
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I booked that flight and i stayed waiting quiet. October passing by, leaving me sleepless and tired. Somehow alone but never lonely. I embrace my soltitude, for my days of waiting for you are gone.
If you ever feel weak, try something for a week. This isn’t about internet clichés of deep breaths and online affirmations (recycled words that rarely work).
SET YOUR MIND, near or far. Don’t get fooled. Choosing far doesn’t mean your problems will remain far behind you. You cannot really outrun what lives inside you. Yet at the same time, choosing near, someplace close to home, doesn’t lessen your power to heal. Miles mean nothing.
What matters is the movement itself.
Maybe I’ll have a blast, maybe i won’t, maybe I’ll fall in love with a Brit, maybe I’ll trip down the street and fall, maybe I’ll find the true purpose of life for 5 minutes and then cry my way home.
I’ts just a week, im not that weak, cause i moved afterall.
See you all very soon!
